Four

 Our Father who art in heaven hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven, give us this day our daily bread, and forgive our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us... 
   I can't tell you how many times I have said that series of words, especially when working in the recovery realms, 'forgive our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us'. Yet, it wasn't until recently that I really delved into it. As I understand it, if I don't forgive those who wrong me, God won't forgive me. 
   I attempted to delve further into it. In that, I found, 
   
'For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive you.' - Matthew 6:14-15. 

  I found it interesting that this verse is not only the direct words of Christ, but is is also the next two verses after the Lord's Prayer. In that, I feel that it was Jesus himself stating the importance of forgiveness, that in the prayer, that was the first thing that he chose to reiterate. For those who read about the lack of exclamation points in Hebrew culture to accentuate importance, this is twice in probably the same breath. Yet, would it be found any more? Yup, in fact there is a full parable about it only a few chapters later. 
   Long story short, a king decided to bring his accounts up to date with the searvants who had borrowed money from him, one of them owed him 10,000 bags of gold. In some translations it is said 10,000 talents. In that, I searched out a talent, it is the equivalent of  75 pounds. So, he owed the king 750,000 lbs. of gold, or in 'now' equivalent, he owed the king $1,352,250,000. So, over a billion dollars. The king knew the servant didn't have the dough, and so he ordered the servant, his wife, his children, and all his stuff to be sold so that he could regain some of what was owed. The servant plead his case to the king, and in that, the king was so moved that he decided to cancel the debt. 
    So this servant is free and clear, and he continues to go on with his life. Shortly after that he runs into one of his workmates, who owed him 100 pence(KJV). Okay, it was more than likely a silver shekel, which is said to weigh approximately 1/4 ounce, so with today's market, it would be the equivalent of $800. When the first servant sees his debtor, he proceeds to rough him up, and then press charges against him so that he is place in prison until he could repay the debt. When the king found out what the first servant had done, he decided his fate, he repealed the forgiveness and had him not only placed in prison, but tortured until he could pay the debt back, which in reality, was not possible, so I'm betting that the servant lived out his days in prison, being tortured by his captors. One quick perspective, the Romans were in power at the time. They were the masters of torture and death, they had refined it an art, and Jesus made sure to say that the first servant was tortured, not just jailed. 
    With all of this told, there is one more verse to this chapter, in the words of Christ, 
    'This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother and sister from your heart' - Matthew 18:35
     For me, this is often the hardest part of my walk, forgiveness like love is supposed to be unconditional, and in that, many who know me, know that holding grudges was one of the things that I was once good at. I would often joke that I was still looking for the doctor who spanked me, and he was gonna pay when I found him. Time and time again, I struggle with this, but I know that in that, God has graced me with forgiveness, and what kinda idiot would I be not to be thankful. In that, I feel it is my duty to pay it forward, and as hard as it is, to forgive as I would want to be forgiven.